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March 23, 2004
yeesh
I just want to echo Bookslut and say, "Fuck Daphne de Marneffe and her new book Maternal Desire: On Children, Love, and the Inner Life." (original entry here and explanation here)
Warning: hugeass rant below. Reading Bookslut's post sort of reminded me about how much this topic pisses me off.
Seriously.
Why is society so damn fixated on children? It's not bad enough that when I mention a friend who's not quite engaged to her bf that my mom says "what, she's not married yet?" because my friend is in her early 30s.
No.
I have to hear all the time about how horrible it is to give birth and how terrifying small children are and what brats middle schoolers are and how atrocious teenagers are... and then be expected to reproduce, regardless of my marital status or interest in motherhood.
If I mention that I don't really think I want kids in the hearing of any female over the age of, say, 25, I have to listen to a longass diatribe about how wonderful kids are. Or worse, how it's my responsibility to have kids. What about my responsibility to not contribute to overpopulation?
More importantly, what about the other things I have to contribute to society? it's as if somehow, because I'm a woman, the most important thing about me is my ability to produce offspring. What is this, the 50s? What happened to the feminist movement? Can't a childless woman be as highly honored and as worthwhile a member of society as a childbearing one? I mean, come on, people. The fact that I don't really want to be a mother is no worse than the fact that I don't really want to be a doctor. Both are honorable, worthwhile professions, but not ones I'm interested in.
Yes, it's entirely possible that I'll change my mind. But right now I have zero desire to give birth or raise kids and wish I could get almost any reaction to that besides a guilt trip.
ARGH!
File under: Rantings
Posted by Ealasaid at March 23, 2004 01:24 PM
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Comments
Even more fun: the people who become parents, don't discipline their offspring, and then look at you oddly when you decline the extreme honour of babysitting the smallhumans.
Don't. Get. Me. Started.
Posted by: Laughing Muse at March 23, 2004 02:37 PM
Just say you're thinking about adopting. That'll get them off your back.
Posted by: Fred at March 23, 2004 03:03 PM
I like the ones who, when you mention adoption and overpopulation and yadda, get all righteous about how it's different having your OWN kids and connection and make me puke already.
Oh, yeah, and children are not wonderful. *A child* may be wonderful (my three-year-old brother being proof of this, although I'll concede the possibility of bias, plus frankly I don't actually live with him), but but to say that an entire population of anything is wonderful is ridiculous.
Posted by: Cathryn at March 24, 2004 10:45 AM
Come on, you guys. I think you're being a bit harsh. Kids are so fun! I used to take this 3-year-old to the pool, wrestle her into her little pink one-piece swimsuit, and play games with her.
"Ellen, where's your NOSE?"
Ellen points & is proud.
"Ellen, where are are your EYES?"
Oh good, she's mastered plurals. Very proud now.
"Ellen, where's your BELLYBUTTON?"
Ellen is very confused. Apparently body parts *go away* when they're covered up. Who knew?
>;)
Posted by: Rachelro at March 26, 2004 07:25 PM
Graphics from works 